Back To School

I first observed her on the bus,

Then I noticed her on the street,

Later on I spotted her going up some steps,

Finally I saw her in the house.

The zoom call was so dull, watching one of the other participants making her way home was the only thing that held my attention. This call was to meet my tutor and new classmates as I have decided to go back to school.

Just like when I was starting a new school year as a child, I got new pens and a massive new notebook to doodle in. I always insisted on new stationary every year, including set squares (which I don’t think I ever used and were always broken by half term) and a fountain pen even though they leaked on everything I owned.

Video calling fun…

Since my earnings were so poor last year, I was treated to a tax rebate by the good people at HMRC. As interest rates are currently lower than a snake’s belly I decided not to invest it (forgoing the chance to earn an extra 11p in the next three years) but instead get a qualification in something useful.

I have enrolled in an online hotel and hospitality course which (if I pass) will gain me a diploma which is, apparently, the same as the first year of an undergraduate degree but without the terror of shared housing or having to queue up for hours on a rainy pavement for hours just to get discounted drinks on a Tuesday evening.

However, one part of the student experience I still get is an NUS card (which has rebranded as Totum). This is very exciting news – discounts on a load of things I haven’t heard of and 10% off at the Co-op. One of the offers advertised is for an extra 15% off an advent calendar worth £370, I wonder how many students get that?

Perhaps I could hire someone to do this for me?

               The course itself consists of ten modules and it is completely online, there are no exams (only assignments) and I can do it whenever I like. If I paid more attention in my tutorial I would have realised that I could do the modules in any order, rather than the order listed, which would have resulted in me not starting with accounting.

               While I appreciate that accounting is important and understand why it is in the course, I will never find it interesting. Trying to work up an interest in overhead recovery rates or activity based costing has been a considerable challenge. My google algorithms also seem to have altered as a result of ‘what is a debenture?’ and ‘in bookkeeping what does GAAP stand for?’ rather than my previous lines of enquiry such as ‘what four colours are on the twister mat?’ or ‘is a llama just a bigger alpaca?’.

               Fortunately, I have five years to complete this and I have already established that resits are free which is good news. Now all I need to find out is where my nearest Co-op is.

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